no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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