I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
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We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
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Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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