I'm drive I can fine osifer
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
its liver damage thursday
Randomize