I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Randomize
