Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize