oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize