He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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