So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize
