Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
