my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
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