i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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