Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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