She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
