last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
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