He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
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Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
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It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
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