How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
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