He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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