conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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