If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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