ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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