nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize