After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
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it glows. i had to have it.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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