i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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