tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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