Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Randomize
