i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Randomize
