It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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