just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
