Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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