and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
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