there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
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