All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
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