Sponge bath it is.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Randomize