Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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