it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
3 2 1 whiskey
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize
