3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
there is glitter all over my balls
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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