Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
there is glitter all over my balls
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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