mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
