i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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