Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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