My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
