I just made out with a guy for $7.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
