So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
