dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
