I want to have your abortion
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
