So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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