My brain says no but my pants say off.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Randomize
