we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
