So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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