imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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