like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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